Saturday, January 7, 2012

Mr. Snarky Achieves World Domination!!!

        It has been quite a while since my last post, but as you can see from the title of this one, I've been quite busy. For my loyal readers (you know who you are) I can offer this mostly sincere apology, courtesy of my tireless team of attorneys: The past few weeks have been a time of extreme personal growth for our client (heretofore known as Mr. Snarky) and his company. We at the Snarky foundation truly hope that none of the patrons of this site have suffered any trauma, injury, mental anguish or disease due to the lack of published material over this time. We sincerely hope that all of our tremendous followers have had a time of self-enlightenment and growth over this extremely difficult period. We hereby indemnify the aforementioned client, Mr. Snarky, from any and all remuneration and/or recompense for damages, loss of income and/or sanity. We publicly apologize while simultaneously admitting absolutely no negligence or criminal behavior. Thank you.

Whew! Glad that's out of the way. Now, you might be wondering, "How did Mr. Snarky achieve world domination? Wouldn't I have heard about it on the news?" To that I would say, "Uhh, well... I..." I hope that clears things up for you.

Okay, well... I have to say that I didn't achieve world domination in the classic Genghis Khan or Alexander the Great definition of the phrase. Probably not even in the Kim Kardashian or Bob Saget definition either. No, this was a bit more subtle, and probably nerdier than all but the last of the four world dominators I mention. The domination I have achieved is twofold. First, this blog that you are currently reading has been viewed in the U.S., Russia, Spain, Indonesia, Egypt and Qatar, among many others. In fact, the only continent we have not breached at this moment is South America, but I'm certain this is only a temporary setback. In fact, loyal readers, I must ask a favor. If you know someone in South America that you can forward a link to, please do it. It would turn Mr. Snarky into Mr. Happy. No, not THAT Mr. Happy. I can't believe you just went there. Pervs!

Part two of World domination is even a bit nerdier than blogging, if you can believe it. Even so, I'm kind of proud. Somewhere in our about me, or one of the early posts, Mrs. Snarky mentioned Sporcle. It's also in the sites we love links on our front page. Over the past few weeks, I have been on Sporcle quite often, memorizing the names and spelling of every country in the world. I can now type the names of all 196 countries, with an unlabeled map showing only their borders, in under 13 minutes. Is this nerdy? Yes. Yes it is. I don't care. I wanted to do it and now I have. I totally rule! Also, it will help me once I qualify for the Jeopardy senior tournament in 20 years or so. Now all I need to learn are all the rivers and cities and Shakespeare's plays and Civil War battles and stock symbols and inventors and kings and symphonies and poems and natural disasters and chemical element symbols and.... oh crap. Nevermind.

Love love love... Mr. Snarky {World Dominator}