Thursday, November 3, 2011

Things Mr. Snarky is thankful for

        A relative of ours posted a request on her blog asking people to name some things they are thankful for. I think she might get more than she bargained for from Mr. Snarky. So anyway, in no particular order (other than the first one being number one which you will definitely understand in a moment) here they come.

1. I am not dead. I like this a whole lot. I prefer me in my state of not-deadness, which is very much different than undead. I wouldn't like that at all I don't think, unless I got to star in a movie about it with Simon Pegg. That might be cool. If you're reading this, I'm pretty sure you like the fact that I'm not dead as well, but who can be certain about these things.

The Rest

I'm very thankful that I'm not talking to that one guy who never stops talking. You know the one. You think he's done and you try to walk away but he keeps following you and never stops talking even when you say something really obnoxious and he still doesn't pick up on it because that guy never listens anyway... all he ever thinks about is himself and you can try to change the subject and he just keeps going on and on and on. Yeah. That guy. Or the guy who smells bad.

I'm thankful for blog posts asking me what I'm thankful for Really. It made me write this. Otherwise I would probably be sleeping right now and who needs that. Maybe I would be sitting here playing plants vs zombies or some other time waster until I got tired.

I am so thankful that I've never fallen on a beer bottle when I was naked. That's all I have to say about that.

I'm thankful that I'm me and not you. No one else gets to be me and that's good. Because I'm better than you. At something anyway. Not sure what. Maybe I'll figure it out when I grow up. (I'm in my 40's)

I'm thankful that I'm not that guy who smells bad.

And beer. I like beer.

I'm thankful that not every song on the radio is by Katie Perry. Cuz that would suck.

I'm thankful for Mrs. Snarky. She laughs at all my attempts at humour; even the ones that aren't funny.

I'm thankful for the British spellings of the words "Humour and Colour" (okay, if she laughs at that, I'll know she's faking cuz it's just not funny)

I'm thankful that the Yankees did not win the World Series this year. They just do that FAR too often.

And finally, I'm thankful for a good book and a warm fire on a cold night; the love of a family member; my good friends; having food to eat and a place to sleep; a good conversation over a cup of coffee; the feeling of a job well done when you've helped someone overcome a problem in their life that they've been working at for years and had no success... or some other crap like that. Oh hell... let's be real. Post-Its... yeah! I'm WAY thankful for Post-Its.

I am also thankful for YOU, dear reader.  With Love, Mister Snarky

3 comments:

  1. I, too, am thankful...that you never fell on a beer bottle when you were naked. Even worse, that you never fell on one when you were nekkid, because that is too awful to contemplate.

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  2. I heard that if you joke around saying that you have never fallen on a beer bottle naked, that you were probably trying to see what the reaction would be from your viewers, and that you probably have a beer bottle in your ass at this very moment. Don't know if it's true or not, just thought I would mention it to you--Mr. Snarky. (just kidding)

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